well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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