Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Randomize