singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize