You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize