Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
