i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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