brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
