Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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