At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize