So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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