I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
