Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
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