Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize