His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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