Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
