What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize