I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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