New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
