Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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