So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
