I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize