No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
