Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
