forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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