Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
