guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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