she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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