Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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