awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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