no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize