I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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