Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
