so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
