Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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