Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
