porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
