Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
