I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Duck Duck Cougar?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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