Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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