Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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