Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
