I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
