I just cut my nipple shaving
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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