trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I deserve to be covered in dicks
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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