I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
