Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize
