Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
