So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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