I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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