too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
